Saturday, March 15, 2008
up all night?
soooo i'm sitting in the library, campus is basically deserted for two reasons...1) it's friday night 2) it's the weekend before spring break. I got kicked out of my dorm at 8pm...so why am i still here? I stayed on campus because I am going to cheer on our guys basketball team as they play in the America East Championship and take a shot at going to the NCAA. I had a few options lined up for where to stay on campus tonite, buuuut they all fell through. Joy. At this point, I'm either A) pulling an all nighter in the library or B) sleeping on a bench in the library. I pulled a couple of last resort options--texted a friend who may or may not be on/near campus and may or may not be sober but would let me crash at his place if he's around. I messaged a girl who had commented on one of the student blog sites about offering a place for people to stay if they needed it. I'm not expecting a reply from either, but it would be nice if I did hear back from one of them. Argh I'm tired, which means that unless I get a reply, I'm most likely crashing in the library. Ah well, I have to be at the arena by 7ish anyway, so no matter what I'm not getting much sleep. This will be an interesting night...I'll be sure to post the results of the game (ESPN2 at 12pm EST) and my sleep or lack thereof tomorrow (well technically later today) or Sunday. I may try to stay up all nite, seeing as there's still some sketchy people around here...
Thursday, March 6, 2008
ramblings
So here I sit listening to my country music, thinking about the things I should be doing, and wondering what, if anything, I'll be doing later tonight. I have this lovely chunk of time between classes, and I have a very busy weekend coming up, so one would think I would read my supreme court cases or do my calc homework. Instead, I'm killing time on the internet, per usual. Ah well, I'll do something productive in a little while. Meanwhile, I've come to the conclusion recently that I really do like my life. Maybe it's the spring fever getting to my head, but I really do have a good life. When I'm not getting caught up in everything there is to do, or letting people get to me, I enjoy my life and I am grateful for it. Yes some things about my school annoy me and everyone else on campus, and yes I always have lots of work to do, but I have the privilege of going to school, when some people don't. Plus I set up my schedule knowing I'd be busy so no right to complain there.
Not much going on lately, staying busy with schoolwork, figuring out how to maintain some semblance of a social life (which usually translates to playing pool with my boys), looking forward to spring break. Gotta get through exams...speaking of which, my spanish profesora is...interesting. She's scatterbrained, ADD, contradicts herself, and has changed the date of our exam 4 times in the past 2 weeks. Currently its still scheduled for the last class before break. If she changes it to after break, I will be very unhappy. I don't want to study over break, I don't want to have to come back from break and first week back have to take an exam.
Political thoughts...friends of mine went down to the state capitol to testify/protest against a bill that would extend instate college tuition to anyone who graduated from a state high school, regardless of citizenship status. I wanted to go, but had an exam that day...boo. To use some internet phrasing I've picked up since being at school, this bill=epic fail. Seriously, there's a limited amount of instate tuition for legal residents already, do we want illegals to be able to get some of that, thus leaving less for the rest of us? Do I want my taxes paying for someone to go to school who doesn't pay taxes, and just lives here mooching off the rest of us? I think not. Stop coddling the illegals!! If they want to get the benefits of living in the US, they can damn well get off their butts and become taxpaying citizens. Don't whine about the children being brought here by their parents and thus it's not their fault. If they're going to college, they're old enough to know they're not supposed to be here, and they can take responsibility for their own citizenship. I emailed every single legislator on the committee that would hear the bill and told them in no uncertain terms not to vote for the bill. The legislators sponsoring this bill need to grow a spine and stop helping people circumvent federal laws.
Muscial thoughts...I need to get more classical music for studying. I have a bit on my ipod, but alot of it is not instrumental, and when I'm listening to classical music, it's cause I don't want words. I'm going home for a few hours this weekend, if I remember I should try and grab some of my parents CD's and put them on my ipod. *Thinking* there's the Bach CD that used to start playing Tocatta and Fugue at 2Am when we forgot to turn off the CD player...that was always an interesting to wake up. There's also the instrumental hymns we got Daddy for Christmas...Always like more old hymns. I've come to the recent conclusion that I cannot live without music, especially country music. I get antsy if I'm anywhere besides class without music for any extended period of time.
Girly thoughts...went to the mall last week with a friend and did some spring preview shopping. I need $$ or some really good spring sales, cuz there's alot of stuff I want :). My spring wardrobe needs updating...yay gift cards. I could also use some spring shoes. I've gotten addicted to flats recently. I used to do heels all the time, but walking around campus doesn't treat heels all that nicely, especially if you go off the sidewalks at all. Flats last alot longer, are a bit more versatile (dress them up or down, they look cute with just about anything), and are usually cheaper. Acrylic nails are wonderful...they're extremely low maintenance, and they look good 24/7, and they last longer than a standard manicure, and they're easier to fix. Hair needs highlighting...but of course this can only be done at 2am hair parties, after a midnite grocery run. I'll have to look into arranging that. Speaking of groceries, I'm hungry...but that's pretty much a constant state of being for me. I love my metabolism but sometimes...
Random thoughts...a friend of mine recently parted ways with a girl he'd been seeing for a while (or so it seems, facebook tells all...). I know he cared about her alot, and I'm slightly worried he's trying to put it behind him too soon. I understand wanting to get over it and move on with life, but when you experience loss on any level, it's important to let yourself grieve, and let yourself be upset. Take a day or two and be depressed, be pissed at the world, be emo, whatever helps you. Part of healing is grieving. I was talking to my parents about this in the fall when my great grandmother went home to Jesus. She was my dad's grandmother, and had alot of influence on him growing up, and as I was unable to be home before the memorial service, I told my mom to make sure that Daddy took time for himself to let himself grieve. He was quickly getting caught up in everything that had to be done with making arrangements and helping my grandmother process all that needed to be done and dealt with, and I knew that if he didn't take time to let himself be upset, he would never be fully better. It's a similar thing with my friend. I know this is hurting him, and I hope he takes time to accept the loss so he can get on with his life.
On a lighter note...Spring is in the air, yay! The past few days have been really nice outside. It's not quite spring yet but it's getting there. It was raining the other night, and one of my friends commented how if it were snow, we would be accumulating quite a bit, and wouldn't that be cool. We then agreed that yeah that'd be nice, but we'll take the warm weather over the cold now. Besides, I like rain. I went walking around the "loop" that is the main road on campus, and by the time I got back I was thoroughly soaked, and probably did some damage to my ipod headphones (technology and water don't get along too well). It was fun though. It was earlier in the evening than I usually go for my walks, so there were still alot of cars going around, probably wondering why the heck I was voluntarily subjecting myself to the weather. Irony: listening to "Walking on Sunshine" while walking in the rain :)
I've always had a bit of a mischievous streak, and I like messing with people. Currently, a friend of mine from highschool, Angel, is trying to figure out who this blog belongs to. I of course am being very mean and just leaving little hints instead of telling him who this is. There's two rather large hints in this post, so maybe that'll help him out.
Uhoh class time so that's all for now.
Peace y'all
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: If you're going to pay $40 to get your nails done, make sure they do a good job of it.
Not much going on lately, staying busy with schoolwork, figuring out how to maintain some semblance of a social life (which usually translates to playing pool with my boys), looking forward to spring break. Gotta get through exams...speaking of which, my spanish profesora is...interesting. She's scatterbrained, ADD, contradicts herself, and has changed the date of our exam 4 times in the past 2 weeks. Currently its still scheduled for the last class before break. If she changes it to after break, I will be very unhappy. I don't want to study over break, I don't want to have to come back from break and first week back have to take an exam.
Political thoughts...friends of mine went down to the state capitol to testify/protest against a bill that would extend instate college tuition to anyone who graduated from a state high school, regardless of citizenship status. I wanted to go, but had an exam that day...boo. To use some internet phrasing I've picked up since being at school, this bill=epic fail. Seriously, there's a limited amount of instate tuition for legal residents already, do we want illegals to be able to get some of that, thus leaving less for the rest of us? Do I want my taxes paying for someone to go to school who doesn't pay taxes, and just lives here mooching off the rest of us? I think not. Stop coddling the illegals!! If they want to get the benefits of living in the US, they can damn well get off their butts and become taxpaying citizens. Don't whine about the children being brought here by their parents and thus it's not their fault. If they're going to college, they're old enough to know they're not supposed to be here, and they can take responsibility for their own citizenship. I emailed every single legislator on the committee that would hear the bill and told them in no uncertain terms not to vote for the bill. The legislators sponsoring this bill need to grow a spine and stop helping people circumvent federal laws.
Muscial thoughts...I need to get more classical music for studying. I have a bit on my ipod, but alot of it is not instrumental, and when I'm listening to classical music, it's cause I don't want words. I'm going home for a few hours this weekend, if I remember I should try and grab some of my parents CD's and put them on my ipod. *Thinking* there's the Bach CD that used to start playing Tocatta and Fugue at 2Am when we forgot to turn off the CD player...that was always an interesting to wake up. There's also the instrumental hymns we got Daddy for Christmas...Always like more old hymns. I've come to the recent conclusion that I cannot live without music, especially country music. I get antsy if I'm anywhere besides class without music for any extended period of time.
Girly thoughts...went to the mall last week with a friend and did some spring preview shopping. I need $$ or some really good spring sales, cuz there's alot of stuff I want :). My spring wardrobe needs updating...yay gift cards. I could also use some spring shoes. I've gotten addicted to flats recently. I used to do heels all the time, but walking around campus doesn't treat heels all that nicely, especially if you go off the sidewalks at all. Flats last alot longer, are a bit more versatile (dress them up or down, they look cute with just about anything), and are usually cheaper. Acrylic nails are wonderful...they're extremely low maintenance, and they look good 24/7, and they last longer than a standard manicure, and they're easier to fix. Hair needs highlighting...but of course this can only be done at 2am hair parties, after a midnite grocery run. I'll have to look into arranging that. Speaking of groceries, I'm hungry...but that's pretty much a constant state of being for me. I love my metabolism but sometimes...
Random thoughts...a friend of mine recently parted ways with a girl he'd been seeing for a while (or so it seems, facebook tells all...). I know he cared about her alot, and I'm slightly worried he's trying to put it behind him too soon. I understand wanting to get over it and move on with life, but when you experience loss on any level, it's important to let yourself grieve, and let yourself be upset. Take a day or two and be depressed, be pissed at the world, be emo, whatever helps you. Part of healing is grieving. I was talking to my parents about this in the fall when my great grandmother went home to Jesus. She was my dad's grandmother, and had alot of influence on him growing up, and as I was unable to be home before the memorial service, I told my mom to make sure that Daddy took time for himself to let himself grieve. He was quickly getting caught up in everything that had to be done with making arrangements and helping my grandmother process all that needed to be done and dealt with, and I knew that if he didn't take time to let himself be upset, he would never be fully better. It's a similar thing with my friend. I know this is hurting him, and I hope he takes time to accept the loss so he can get on with his life.
On a lighter note...Spring is in the air, yay! The past few days have been really nice outside. It's not quite spring yet but it's getting there. It was raining the other night, and one of my friends commented how if it were snow, we would be accumulating quite a bit, and wouldn't that be cool. We then agreed that yeah that'd be nice, but we'll take the warm weather over the cold now. Besides, I like rain. I went walking around the "loop" that is the main road on campus, and by the time I got back I was thoroughly soaked, and probably did some damage to my ipod headphones (technology and water don't get along too well). It was fun though. It was earlier in the evening than I usually go for my walks, so there were still alot of cars going around, probably wondering why the heck I was voluntarily subjecting myself to the weather. Irony: listening to "Walking on Sunshine" while walking in the rain :)
I've always had a bit of a mischievous streak, and I like messing with people. Currently, a friend of mine from highschool, Angel, is trying to figure out who this blog belongs to. I of course am being very mean and just leaving little hints instead of telling him who this is. There's two rather large hints in this post, so maybe that'll help him out.
Uhoh class time so that's all for now.
Peace y'all
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: If you're going to pay $40 to get your nails done, make sure they do a good job of it.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
How are you?
So the title of this post is something that you hear alot. You pass someone you know on the way to class, or you stop briefly to chat with a friend you haven't talked to in a little while. This is a generic question, one that, for me at least, is not often answered with complete honesty. Often it's simply because things are generally ok and I don't have the time to stop and explain every detail of my life's activities. Other times it's that I don't know the person well enough to feel inclined to describe how things are going. Many times it's that I'm not sure myself what to make of my life. Sometimes I feel bad talking with someone I don't know particularly well or haven't talked to in a bit and having nothing to say outside of "How are you? How are your classes?" I've realized recently that taking time to ask more specific questions can help people feel like you genuinely care about them and their well being. So the next time someone says "Hey, how are you?" and I'm not rushing off to class, I'm going to take a minute and say something beyond "Fine", "Good", or "okay, tired, busy".
The busted elbow is getting much better, it seems I didn't do nearly as much damage the second time around. Sling use has been relegated to sleep time, which isn't a major inconvenience. I acutally don't mind, because often by the end of a busy day, my arm is tired and needs the rest and the support. According to my friend's father who is a doctor, the ligaments take six weeks to fully heal, and I'm sure two dislocations in one month doesn't aid that any.
School is going to be very very busy this semester. I am taking six classes, 19 credits total, 17 of which are academic. I like the work and the classes so I'm more motivated to do my work (which is what I'm supposed to be doing right now). I enjoy being busy, and so long as I stay on top of the work, stress should be minimal and the workload not terribly difficult.
This past week was very eventful and interesting, in several ways. I have discovered/reaffirmed something I knew but didn't know: I have some amazing friends. I am reminded of the Tracy Lawrence song "Find Out Who Your Friends Are". The song talks about how when your life is going well, you have alot of friends, and alot of people who say they care about you and will help you if ever you need it. It goes on to say that when your life sucks, and you fall flat on your face, that's when you find out who really is your friend. It's the people who are there helping you up when you do something really dumb, when they could easily have left you to your own devices and the consequences of your actions.
This past Wednesday evening, I was with a group of people at a small party/get together we were having in the interest of getting everyone together before work and school and social commitments took everyone their separate ways. I decided it would be a good idea to consume what amounted to about 7 shots of Vodka and Cointreau over the course of about 25-30mins. BAD BAD BAD IDEA!! My body mass does not tolerate that high of a concentration in such a short period of time. This I discovered very quickly. Once I got about halfway through the second martini, I started to realize what I had done. For the next hour or so, three of my friends were taking care of me, talking to me, cleaning me up, and doing their best to keep me from the prying eyes of the rest of the group. Thinking back, I can only imagine what a sight I must have been. Words cannot express my gratitude for the three guys who proved their friendship and took care of me when they would, I'm sure, have much rather been enjoying themselves with the rest of the party. I don't know if I will ever have an opportunity to show them a kindness on a similar level, but I will forever be indebted to them for taking care of me. <3 those guys so much!
On a lighter note, this week should prove to be entertaining and interesting, as classes get into full swing. As school gets busier, it'll mean my social life simplifies, which will be nice. Yesterday I had the opportunity to attend part of CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference) and see the movie "Cloverfield". CPAC was lots of fun, very interesting speakers and panels. For anyone familiar with the Washington D.C. metro system, the green line is not a place you want to be after dark. "Cloverfield" was not worth $8.50 of my money. It wasn't a terrible movie, but it wasn't all that great either. It was a mildly interesting way to kill and hour and half. I recommend either seeing it at a time with a discounted rate, or waiting until it comes out on DVD, or catching it at some small town theatre that only charges a few dollars for a movie. I know at a Loewe's theatre near my family's house, they only charge $5 for any movie you see on Sunday mornings before 12pm. My friends and I did this after church one day and got a great movie for a good price. More money for popcorn :)
So that's pretty much it for now. Now to go make something of my day and actually get some work done.
Peace y'all
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: Don't ask your friend for directions to the nearest train station when they have been drinking, even if they swear they're just buzzed. This will result in wandering around the city for a good hour or so, until you wind up in a not so great area of town.
The busted elbow is getting much better, it seems I didn't do nearly as much damage the second time around. Sling use has been relegated to sleep time, which isn't a major inconvenience. I acutally don't mind, because often by the end of a busy day, my arm is tired and needs the rest and the support. According to my friend's father who is a doctor, the ligaments take six weeks to fully heal, and I'm sure two dislocations in one month doesn't aid that any.
School is going to be very very busy this semester. I am taking six classes, 19 credits total, 17 of which are academic. I like the work and the classes so I'm more motivated to do my work (which is what I'm supposed to be doing right now). I enjoy being busy, and so long as I stay on top of the work, stress should be minimal and the workload not terribly difficult.
This past week was very eventful and interesting, in several ways. I have discovered/reaffirmed something I knew but didn't know: I have some amazing friends. I am reminded of the Tracy Lawrence song "Find Out Who Your Friends Are". The song talks about how when your life is going well, you have alot of friends, and alot of people who say they care about you and will help you if ever you need it. It goes on to say that when your life sucks, and you fall flat on your face, that's when you find out who really is your friend. It's the people who are there helping you up when you do something really dumb, when they could easily have left you to your own devices and the consequences of your actions.
This past Wednesday evening, I was with a group of people at a small party/get together we were having in the interest of getting everyone together before work and school and social commitments took everyone their separate ways. I decided it would be a good idea to consume what amounted to about 7 shots of Vodka and Cointreau over the course of about 25-30mins. BAD BAD BAD IDEA!! My body mass does not tolerate that high of a concentration in such a short period of time. This I discovered very quickly. Once I got about halfway through the second martini, I started to realize what I had done. For the next hour or so, three of my friends were taking care of me, talking to me, cleaning me up, and doing their best to keep me from the prying eyes of the rest of the group. Thinking back, I can only imagine what a sight I must have been. Words cannot express my gratitude for the three guys who proved their friendship and took care of me when they would, I'm sure, have much rather been enjoying themselves with the rest of the party. I don't know if I will ever have an opportunity to show them a kindness on a similar level, but I will forever be indebted to them for taking care of me. <3 those guys so much!
On a lighter note, this week should prove to be entertaining and interesting, as classes get into full swing. As school gets busier, it'll mean my social life simplifies, which will be nice. Yesterday I had the opportunity to attend part of CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference) and see the movie "Cloverfield". CPAC was lots of fun, very interesting speakers and panels. For anyone familiar with the Washington D.C. metro system, the green line is not a place you want to be after dark. "Cloverfield" was not worth $8.50 of my money. It wasn't a terrible movie, but it wasn't all that great either. It was a mildly interesting way to kill and hour and half. I recommend either seeing it at a time with a discounted rate, or waiting until it comes out on DVD, or catching it at some small town theatre that only charges a few dollars for a movie. I know at a Loewe's theatre near my family's house, they only charge $5 for any movie you see on Sunday mornings before 12pm. My friends and I did this after church one day and got a great movie for a good price. More money for popcorn :)
So that's pretty much it for now. Now to go make something of my day and actually get some work done.
Peace y'all
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: Don't ask your friend for directions to the nearest train station when they have been drinking, even if they swear they're just buzzed. This will result in wandering around the city for a good hour or so, until you wind up in a not so great area of town.
Friday, January 25, 2008
follow up on "a time to mourn"
updates:
Heath Ledger: call me an absolute sap, but what I will miss the most about Heath Ledger is his adorable smile. It was one of those where you just can't help but smile too. Investigations are pointing more towards his death being accidental, which is not surprising, considering that some of the prescriptions given him carry a side effect of breathing issues that can be dangerous when you fall asleep. He may very well have gone to sleep and never woken up. Sad...
my arm: went to the doctor on weds, he didn't say a word about physical therapy, praise Jesus! I was thrilled. He wants me to still wear the sling sometimes for another two weeks, so that'll be when i'm around my room and such. walking around to classes etc is dificil with only one usable arm. Speaking of classes...
school: classes resume monday, it will be good to be back. I'm looking forward to almost all my classes, and not particularly dreading any of them. Now I just need my books to arrive.
politics: Thompson and Kucinich have dropped out, narrowing the field on both sides. The democrats are spouting "change" without any real plan to make it happen and the republicans can't find one candidate who embodies all their values. I love politics...(sarcasm but in truth I really do love politics)
my life: I really do like my life. It has its ups and downs and frustrations which havn't been solved but I really do have a great life. God is good.
peace y'all
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson #2 for the week: driving 48 mph past a speed camera in a 35 mph zone will cost you $40 in these parts of town. I learned this from my parents today :)
Heath Ledger: call me an absolute sap, but what I will miss the most about Heath Ledger is his adorable smile. It was one of those where you just can't help but smile too. Investigations are pointing more towards his death being accidental, which is not surprising, considering that some of the prescriptions given him carry a side effect of breathing issues that can be dangerous when you fall asleep. He may very well have gone to sleep and never woken up. Sad...
my arm: went to the doctor on weds, he didn't say a word about physical therapy, praise Jesus! I was thrilled. He wants me to still wear the sling sometimes for another two weeks, so that'll be when i'm around my room and such. walking around to classes etc is dificil with only one usable arm. Speaking of classes...
school: classes resume monday, it will be good to be back. I'm looking forward to almost all my classes, and not particularly dreading any of them. Now I just need my books to arrive.
politics: Thompson and Kucinich have dropped out, narrowing the field on both sides. The democrats are spouting "change" without any real plan to make it happen and the republicans can't find one candidate who embodies all their values. I love politics...(sarcasm but in truth I really do love politics)
my life: I really do like my life. It has its ups and downs and frustrations which havn't been solved but I really do have a great life. God is good.
peace y'all
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson #2 for the week: driving 48 mph past a speed camera in a 35 mph zone will cost you $40 in these parts of town. I learned this from my parents today :)
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
A time to mourn
Well today (or yesterday by this time) was a sad day. It was the 35th anniversary of the Supreme Court's decision in the Roe vs. Wade case to allow the deaths of millions of unborn children. Since January 22, 1973, 48 million unborn babies have been aborted, their lives casually tossed aside and ended with hardly a second thought. This my friends is murder. No matter your political position, this is beyond politics. Abortion is murder. Life begins at conception. As much as Ron Paul may be a nut job, I think he summed it up well when addressing the pro-life rally today in Washington D.C. "When I was in medical school, I was taught that when I am treating a pregnant woman, I am dealing with two lives, that of the mother and her child." Women are being lied to everyday, and being told that abortion is their best option when in reality it's not. Today in America, the notion of slavery is unthinkable. 150 years ago, it was the hot button issue in the political world. I pray that it does not take 100 years to overturn this genocide that is a blot on our nation today. I pray that America's leaders would have courage to stand up and fight for justice for those who cannot speak for themselves. I pray that each and every state in the United States of America would not only continue to uphold partial birth abortion laws, but completely outlaw any and all forms of this genocide that has infected our nation. When I get taxes taken out of my paycheck, it makes me sick to think that some of those taxes are going to support organizations like Planned Parenthood. We need to stand up and educate the world. A fetus is not just a blob of tissue, or an undefinable mass of cells. It is a living human being from the moment it is conceived. We as a younger generation need to stand up and take responsibility. We need to stop letting the feminists and morally liberal activists tell a woman that she has the "right" to discard another human life. Like slavery today, abortion should be unthinkable, beyond a political debate. It is murder. Since 1973, 48 million children have been denied their constitutional right to Life. We make such a big deal over what, if any, constitutional benefits should be allowed to illegal immigrants, while everyday thousands of children don't even have a chance to take their first constitutionally protected breath. It sickens me that a country which prides itself on equality and justice everyday denies life to thousands of potential citizens, simply because they are an inconvenience to someone. I'll be damned if I let this continue without a fight. Today in our nation's captial, 400,000 people from around the continental US came to rally, walk, chant, and sing, and show the world that we're not giving up until something is done to reverse this awful tradgedy.
On the evening news, the pro-life rally and march got a total of maybe 15 seconds mention. The death of actor Heath Ledger got a full 3 minutes. Now I am mourning this loss as much as any other female age 14-30 around the world. However, it says something about our nation's priorities when the death of a superstar gets featured all over the cable tv and a rally for the lives of the innocent is touched on as an obligatory side note. God have mercy on our nation.
Now if you all will excuse me, I need to go download (yay ruckus) A Knight's Tale, 10 Things I Hate About You, The Patriot, possibly Brokeback Mountain (not sure I can stomach that one, but I may try) and sit and wait for this summer's premiere of the new batman movie. I think Heath Ledger's untimely death further proves that celebrities should not be allowed to have pills unless they are administered in the proper dosage by a doctor. *Sigh* of all people to die, why Heath Ledger? Why so young? What a waste of talent, potential, and good looks. Hollywood will not be the same without him.
In closing, I'm still praying for patience, and an attention span. I need to get back to school so I have something on which to foucus my mind. The elbow area has healed quite nicely so far, I have at least 90% of my total range of motion back just since last monday and it gets better every day, praise God. I go to the doctor tomorrow, hopefully he'll have good news for me.
Peace y'all
P. S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: running on icy 5 day old snow in shoes with no traction is a recipe for disaster, or at least a good bruise.
On the evening news, the pro-life rally and march got a total of maybe 15 seconds mention. The death of actor Heath Ledger got a full 3 minutes. Now I am mourning this loss as much as any other female age 14-30 around the world. However, it says something about our nation's priorities when the death of a superstar gets featured all over the cable tv and a rally for the lives of the innocent is touched on as an obligatory side note. God have mercy on our nation.
Now if you all will excuse me, I need to go download (yay ruckus) A Knight's Tale, 10 Things I Hate About You, The Patriot, possibly Brokeback Mountain (not sure I can stomach that one, but I may try) and sit and wait for this summer's premiere of the new batman movie. I think Heath Ledger's untimely death further proves that celebrities should not be allowed to have pills unless they are administered in the proper dosage by a doctor. *Sigh* of all people to die, why Heath Ledger? Why so young? What a waste of talent, potential, and good looks. Hollywood will not be the same without him.
In closing, I'm still praying for patience, and an attention span. I need to get back to school so I have something on which to foucus my mind. The elbow area has healed quite nicely so far, I have at least 90% of my total range of motion back just since last monday and it gets better every day, praise God. I go to the doctor tomorrow, hopefully he'll have good news for me.
Peace y'all
P. S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: running on icy 5 day old snow in shoes with no traction is a recipe for disaster, or at least a good bruise.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
winter break and other such stories
contemplations on patience...
I love irony. I love finding it in everyday life, and observing it in others' lives. It's one of my simple amusements. Recently I came across a rather glaring point of irony in my own life, though not so amusing. It had to do with patience, my constant preaching thereon, and my general lack thereof. I often find myself telling my friends to "just be patient", or what my best friend usually hears, "patience is a virtue". Yet I have discovered that despite my own frustrations with the general impatience of the "I want it now" generation, I myself often succumb to the same impatience. Now I'm generally not your openly rebellious type. I prefer to find subtler, more creative ways to flout the system. (note: the term "sparkling water" can be applied to a variety of clear liquids generally prohibited in the high school hallways) However, I also happen to have a very independent streak about me. Granted I'm not afraid to ask for help if I really need it, but I'll do my damndest to accomplish it on my own before I even consider asking for help. Recently, my physical independence has been challenged with the onset of a dislocated elbow. Being confined to a splint and sling for three days nearly drove me crazy, as did having to get help with basic tasks like cutting food, washing my hair, and any buttons that came above my stomach. God, when I asked for help with patience, this wasn't exactly what I had in mind. On the plus side, I progressed rather well in learning to type with one hand. Today was my first full day without the splint, although I am still supposed to keep my arm in the sling for most of the day and exercise it within the sling. I am exceedingly grateful that so far, it has healed very well and I have about 70% of my range of motion back. Now, if I obey the doctor, and keep it in the sling for the next two weeks (blah) I will greatly decrease my likelihood of needing physical therapy. Needless to say, PT is time consuming and expensive, I have no way to get there (unless I want to take a public bus through the inner city around school...not so much) and my parents and I are not the least bit interested in fighting with the insurance company. Back to my original point: I'm still confined to the sling, and even if I'm being bad and taking it out of the sling, I still don't have all my range of motion back. I am still confronted with those uncomfortable, oft painful moments of "ohhhhh wow my arm does not bend that way just yet". So I'm once again forced to be patient. God works in mysterious ways...
Another exercise in patience is people.
Contemplations on varying emotional responses: I've often discovered that frustration and anger, when directed at people, are often a result and/or a cover for hurt. We get angry and frustrated with people when they fail to meet our expectations. The more justified we feel these expectations are, the stronger our frustrations and anger tend to grow. If we're fortunate, we have a healthy outlet for this frustration and anger (mine is writing, can you tell?) and it dissipates, if only temporarily. What remains after you finish venting to your teddybear, or your journal, or your best friend, or the air? Heartache, to some degree. The pain of knowing someone you care about has let you down. Most of the time, getting hurt is a choice. If you let someone hurt you, that then gives them the upper hand. Everytime you care about someone, and let them be a part of your life, you take the chance that they will hurt you, because we are all human, and ultimately fail each other at some point or another. Yet it's no use trying to live your life keeping everyone at a safe distance. Trust me, I've tried it. Face it: we need others in our lives, even if it's only a select few. Getting hurt is a part of life, because we live in a fallen world. I have a friend who laugh and point out my cynicism here, but it's reality. So what then? Live with the ever repeating cycle of hurt-frustration-anger-venting-hurt? For many people, yes. As for me, I've learned that this is not healthy or productive. As difficult as it may seem, the best option is to forgive and move on. Clear the air, if at all possible, and resolve any misunderstandings. Forgiveness is not easy. Forgiveness does not mean it hurts any less. Forgiveness does not mean everything is all of the sudden forgotten. Forgiveness means moving beyond the frustration and anger, not going through life staying mad at someone. The hurt may lessen with time, or it may always be there. Ultimately the choice is ours: to use energy and thoughts holding on to anger and frustration, or to let go, and move on. As for me, I've found that there's much more peace in my life when I choose to ask God to help me forgive.
After all that deep, pyschological, emotional crap, I'll wrap up with a movie recommendation.
"Music and Lyrics" : Hugh Grant, Drew Barrymore. Chick Flick. Romantic Comedy. Predictable, but not boring. Entertaining. Cute. Moral of the story: all teenage girls are romantics at heart, even if they are sex-obsessed, philosophically confused pop stars.
In closing: Don't stop believing, there's always something more :)
peace y'all...
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: make sure your hands are thoroughly cleansed of powdered cleaning chemicals before attempting to lick the soup off your fingers.
I love irony. I love finding it in everyday life, and observing it in others' lives. It's one of my simple amusements. Recently I came across a rather glaring point of irony in my own life, though not so amusing. It had to do with patience, my constant preaching thereon, and my general lack thereof. I often find myself telling my friends to "just be patient", or what my best friend usually hears, "patience is a virtue". Yet I have discovered that despite my own frustrations with the general impatience of the "I want it now" generation, I myself often succumb to the same impatience. Now I'm generally not your openly rebellious type. I prefer to find subtler, more creative ways to flout the system. (note: the term "sparkling water" can be applied to a variety of clear liquids generally prohibited in the high school hallways) However, I also happen to have a very independent streak about me. Granted I'm not afraid to ask for help if I really need it, but I'll do my damndest to accomplish it on my own before I even consider asking for help. Recently, my physical independence has been challenged with the onset of a dislocated elbow. Being confined to a splint and sling for three days nearly drove me crazy, as did having to get help with basic tasks like cutting food, washing my hair, and any buttons that came above my stomach. God, when I asked for help with patience, this wasn't exactly what I had in mind. On the plus side, I progressed rather well in learning to type with one hand. Today was my first full day without the splint, although I am still supposed to keep my arm in the sling for most of the day and exercise it within the sling. I am exceedingly grateful that so far, it has healed very well and I have about 70% of my range of motion back. Now, if I obey the doctor, and keep it in the sling for the next two weeks (blah) I will greatly decrease my likelihood of needing physical therapy. Needless to say, PT is time consuming and expensive, I have no way to get there (unless I want to take a public bus through the inner city around school...not so much) and my parents and I are not the least bit interested in fighting with the insurance company. Back to my original point: I'm still confined to the sling, and even if I'm being bad and taking it out of the sling, I still don't have all my range of motion back. I am still confronted with those uncomfortable, oft painful moments of "ohhhhh wow my arm does not bend that way just yet". So I'm once again forced to be patient. God works in mysterious ways...
Another exercise in patience is people.
- The people at work, who show up five minutes before their scheduled time slot, order non precooked food, and then get upset because you are not filling their order fast enough. Why don't you bloody well try showing up before your time slot, or if you really insist on showing up at the last minute, don't order food that takes 10 minutes to cook and then act like we're at fault for not being quick enough to fill your order or print your ticket.
- The part time employee who decides that they are the special exception to the "you close, you clean and restock" rule. Which then doubles my work because little miss sunshine decided to go home early and skip the last few chores at work. A pox upon you!
- Friends who don't act like friends, and seem to think that they can go on about their merry lives without a care while you sit around wondering what the hell is going on. Meanwhile you're left to stew, torn between a) wanting to hunt them down and elaborate quite fiercely on just what you think of their behaviour, b) sitting around hoping and praying it's just a phase, and it will all work itself out in time, or c) throwing your hands up and saying "to devil with you" and walking away, shaking the dirt from your shoes as you do. granted those who started that trend had more justification for it than I do, but it was for similar reasons.
Contemplations on varying emotional responses: I've often discovered that frustration and anger, when directed at people, are often a result and/or a cover for hurt. We get angry and frustrated with people when they fail to meet our expectations. The more justified we feel these expectations are, the stronger our frustrations and anger tend to grow. If we're fortunate, we have a healthy outlet for this frustration and anger (mine is writing, can you tell?) and it dissipates, if only temporarily. What remains after you finish venting to your teddybear, or your journal, or your best friend, or the air? Heartache, to some degree. The pain of knowing someone you care about has let you down. Most of the time, getting hurt is a choice. If you let someone hurt you, that then gives them the upper hand. Everytime you care about someone, and let them be a part of your life, you take the chance that they will hurt you, because we are all human, and ultimately fail each other at some point or another. Yet it's no use trying to live your life keeping everyone at a safe distance. Trust me, I've tried it. Face it: we need others in our lives, even if it's only a select few. Getting hurt is a part of life, because we live in a fallen world. I have a friend who laugh and point out my cynicism here, but it's reality. So what then? Live with the ever repeating cycle of hurt-frustration-anger-venting-hurt? For many people, yes. As for me, I've learned that this is not healthy or productive. As difficult as it may seem, the best option is to forgive and move on. Clear the air, if at all possible, and resolve any misunderstandings. Forgiveness is not easy. Forgiveness does not mean it hurts any less. Forgiveness does not mean everything is all of the sudden forgotten. Forgiveness means moving beyond the frustration and anger, not going through life staying mad at someone. The hurt may lessen with time, or it may always be there. Ultimately the choice is ours: to use energy and thoughts holding on to anger and frustration, or to let go, and move on. As for me, I've found that there's much more peace in my life when I choose to ask God to help me forgive.
After all that deep, pyschological, emotional crap, I'll wrap up with a movie recommendation.
"Music and Lyrics" : Hugh Grant, Drew Barrymore. Chick Flick. Romantic Comedy. Predictable, but not boring. Entertaining. Cute. Moral of the story: all teenage girls are romantics at heart, even if they are sex-obsessed, philosophically confused pop stars.
In closing: Don't stop believing, there's always something more :)
peace y'all...
P.S. Common Sense Life Lesson for the week: make sure your hands are thoroughly cleansed of powdered cleaning chemicals before attempting to lick the soup off your fingers.
Monday, January 7, 2008
it's one of those days...
Disclaimer...this post is gonna be me bitching about the crap in my life. If you don't want to read a downer post, don't read this.
So I just found out my best friend and I don't have aligning spring breaks. which sucks bigtime. why? because number one our schools are a thousand miles apart as it is. number two, her family is moving 5 states away from our hometown come summer. Neither of us is too excited about the prospect of not seeing each other until after school lets out. That's four and a half months from now and we've never been apart that long. Not cool. Now I get to totally reconfigure my plans for spring break. Damnit.
The weather outside is gorgeous and feels more like may than January. I should be enjoying it, but all I can think about is how its not helping any of the nearby ski venues make snow. I want to go skiing and I want snow! It's the middle of freaking January! arrrggh. Well maybe the freakish weather will bring more people to work so I can have something to do instead of getting paid to stand around and do absolutely nothing.
I don't go back to school for another three weeks but I'm already bored being home. Yes I love my family and the relaxing pace of being home and having my own room and bathroom. Unfourtunately, my siblings are back in school, my dad is back to work and my mom has resumed her daily schedule. So that leaves me to beg my friends to get me out of the house on the days I'm not working. Thank God for work otherwise I'd probably go stir crazy.
As I write this I'm laying on my wonderful queen sized bed listening to country radio. Even country music is grating on me somewhat, due to my rather pissy mood. Sadness...country is my favourite.
On a brighter note...I had the oppourtunity to see Trans Siberian Orchestra in concert last night. I love seeing them live, their shows are always spectacular. This one was definitely worth the money, which wasn't overly expensive considering the quality seating position I managed to obtain. Another plus in my trying-not-to-waste-a-good-day-bitching life is that I obtained clearance for a dance class next semester that I had really been hoping to get. Clearance also obtained with very little redtape, unusual for my school.
Well I'm going to go try and make the best of what remains of my day by indulging in some comfort food and seeing if I can't get out of the house tonite. Maybe I'll even go read a book in the sunshine and escape to someone else's world and problems. Peace y'all...
P.S. Common sense life lesson for the week: don't put your belongings on the floor at a concert when the people surrounding you are eagerly consuming cheap beer. French Designer purse+cheap beer+dirty arena floor=not good! *Sigh*
So I just found out my best friend and I don't have aligning spring breaks. which sucks bigtime. why? because number one our schools are a thousand miles apart as it is. number two, her family is moving 5 states away from our hometown come summer. Neither of us is too excited about the prospect of not seeing each other until after school lets out. That's four and a half months from now and we've never been apart that long. Not cool. Now I get to totally reconfigure my plans for spring break. Damnit.
The weather outside is gorgeous and feels more like may than January. I should be enjoying it, but all I can think about is how its not helping any of the nearby ski venues make snow. I want to go skiing and I want snow! It's the middle of freaking January! arrrggh. Well maybe the freakish weather will bring more people to work so I can have something to do instead of getting paid to stand around and do absolutely nothing.
I don't go back to school for another three weeks but I'm already bored being home. Yes I love my family and the relaxing pace of being home and having my own room and bathroom. Unfourtunately, my siblings are back in school, my dad is back to work and my mom has resumed her daily schedule. So that leaves me to beg my friends to get me out of the house on the days I'm not working. Thank God for work otherwise I'd probably go stir crazy.
As I write this I'm laying on my wonderful queen sized bed listening to country radio. Even country music is grating on me somewhat, due to my rather pissy mood. Sadness...country is my favourite.
On a brighter note...I had the oppourtunity to see Trans Siberian Orchestra in concert last night. I love seeing them live, their shows are always spectacular. This one was definitely worth the money, which wasn't overly expensive considering the quality seating position I managed to obtain. Another plus in my trying-not-to-waste-a-good-day-bitching life is that I obtained clearance for a dance class next semester that I had really been hoping to get. Clearance also obtained with very little redtape, unusual for my school.
Well I'm going to go try and make the best of what remains of my day by indulging in some comfort food and seeing if I can't get out of the house tonite. Maybe I'll even go read a book in the sunshine and escape to someone else's world and problems. Peace y'all...
P.S. Common sense life lesson for the week: don't put your belongings on the floor at a concert when the people surrounding you are eagerly consuming cheap beer. French Designer purse+cheap beer+dirty arena floor=not good! *Sigh*
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)