Today, April 2, 2009, marks six months since the passing of the person who had the most effect on the first 19 years of my life apart from my immediate family. That person is my Grandmother, my dad's mom. She died from complications of a stroke on October 2, 2008. She was the best person I've ever known. She was and always will be my role model and my hero.
When Grammy died back in October, I was completely heartbroken. I was devastated beyond anything I'd ever felt or have felt since. I did not understand how someone who had always been an integral part of my life could be taken from me and everyone who loved her. I honestly had no comprehension of how I and my family were supposed to continue with our lives. I was sad, confused, and angry.
Life does go on, and here I am 6 months later, going about my life. Ultimately, I know that Grammy is in Heaven, singing with the angels, because she had placed her faith in Christ, and knew Him as Lord and Saviour. I know she's happy, and that it was the best thing. I would so much rather her be in Heaven and free from her earthly pain than trapped here as a vegetable, which was essentially the case for the few days she was alive following the stroke.
If there's one thing I've learned, it's that I'm not always going to understand why things happen. Sometimes, the answers are revealed later. Sometimes, we never know. God has a plan, and I might not always, or even usually, understand it, but I have to trust that he knows what He's doing.
I miss my Grandmother every day, more than words could ever express. I know that she is watching over me every day, and that I will see her again. I love you and miss you so much! Sing for Jesus now. <3
Currently listening:
Hear You Me--Jimmy Eat World
Go Rest High--Vince Gill
I Still Miss You--Keith Anderson
Probably Wouldn't Be This Way--Leann Rimes
When You're Gone--Avril Lavigne
Holes in the Floor of Heaven--Steve Wariner
